I have been fighting myself as to whether to share this, but I will because I am really taken aback by this behavior.
I work with a guy who is nice, funny but I feel like there is a bit of an undercurrent of emotion in him. I will get into that later.
When we met last year, he seemed nice. New dad, young (older than me), etc. He gravitated to me and I admit I was taken aback by this attention. Months would pass and we wouldn't see or talk to each other but I noticed that more often than not he would flirt with me or say things that could be construed as flirtations. Well this is where we are at:
- He has touched my head and rubbed my hair
- Gotten close to my neck and smelled me
- His hands linger. Like if he reaches back to touch something or rests his hands somewhere and its near mine he won't move.
- Flirtatious comments
- Play hit me in the arm in passing
- Look me up and down when talking to me
- Bumped into me from behind (came up behind me) to startle me
I think that's the gist. What are your thoughts folks?
He talks about his wife but I will say never affectionately. It's very matter of factly.
Am I reading too much into this?
4/30/09
Aren't You Married?
Posted by Seattle Slim at 3:52 PM
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32 comments:
If all those things you listed have happened more than once, then you're definitely not reading too much into it. He's flirting with you.
Some people think office flirting is ok and in some ways it's hard not to because you see those people so much. I definitely flirt with some of my co-workers (but they're not married).
The tricky part is trying to decide what to do about it... I hate being in these types of situations because you don't want to make it awkward, you just want them to back up.
Definitely flirting. I mean it is hard for these type of situations not to occur since we spend more and more of our time at work. My Hubby is always reminding me that I cant have a "Work Hubby" which I see other women and men do alot- mainly those that stay after six together all the time. If it makes you uncomfortable call him out on it! I have had to cut the cord on a couple possible work hubbies in a friendly joking manner and they've gotten the hint.
CarmellesFabulosity
Yes, he's flirting. Is it harmless? In this case, I think so if you keep yourself at bay. But if you do not, then I think he would be more than willing to cross the line.
is it flirting? hell yeah. he's just waiting on you to give him the okay that you are willing to cross the line and you two can be work spouses having quickies at lunch, lol. Flirting is relatively harmless and can actually be fun if you keep the boundaries. If it is uncomfortable for you then you need to say so in a friendly/joking/but I'm serious way that will let him save face but get the hint and respect your boundaries.
Yes he is flirting but equally, you are letting him. I'm married (female) and if a man came within 6 inches of my neck, he would get a slap. Do you like him? If you do, that's ok but be respectful and keep your distance.
Yes he's interested/attracted to you. He has gone beyond what I consider harmless flirting, he's trying to feel you out to see if you're equally as interested. If you are attracted to him (which it reads like you are) then you need to decide the rules of engagement b/c really the ball is in your court. He's sniffing around like all dogs do.
His marriage is obviously just a technicality b/c he doesn't seem to be even attempting descretion. Be careful, there is a third party, his wife and you don't want to be his reason or her reaction.
Listen, I suppose that you're a grown woman so if you want an answer, why don't you just simply ask him what does he want from you? The man is still married, therefore you don't want to get in the mix of something that is that delicate. I don't want you to get you're feelings all up in the sky to realize that all he wanted was a bit of action. If I were in your shoes, i would ask what are his intentions. Once again, that's my opinion. Let me know what happened.
no, he's flirting....do you like him too? his poor wife... i hate married men who act like they're not married...who told him to get married in the first place if you're still trying to sow your oats??
Well I'd say he's flirting with you but still trying to respect his relationship as well as you by not going any further because he IS married. And I suggest you two don't go past friendship for the sake of his marriage. I know you really don't owe her anything but just think of how you would feel if you were his wife. Just a thought... plus you don't wanna go through that drama. I've seen too many of my relatives go through it and it's not fun at all.
This is inappropriate behavior on his part and you need to put the kibash on it PRONTO! First of all - you're at WORK. Second, he's in a relationship where there's a child involved. Third, if he really RESPECTED you he wouldn't be doing any of this period. He;s testing you alright, to see if you're a woman of substance with standards. If not he'll likely pursue something physical for his own selfish needs. He may very well have a great home life with a devoted wife but is AN *SSHOLE with no CHARACTER. The question is: WHY are YOU entertaining him? Where are YOUR standards? He would've been smacked down by me with a quickness thinking I was some trick he could that mess with.
He is definitely trying to get in your pants. Follow your instinct and stay away.
areyouagoodcatch.blogspot.com
I got a follow up coming.
no you are not crazy-but run like HELL. not even hell, i mean HEEEEE-YUUULLLLLL.
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